All Clear

I can't believe that as I'm writing this, we're already a couple of hours into December 29th. Lately, I've been feeling particularly exhausted. Mentally, I just can't seem to rest thinking about how the last few months have changed our lives, worrying that Wil's back is going give out every time he sneezes, and how I would completely lose it altogether if he is to be admitted one more time this year. My mental state was held together by a paper clip and every tiny hiccup in our day caused the waterworks to flow. I constantly yelled at Wil because I was petrified that whatever he was doing, besides laying down on the couch, was surely going to put him back in the hospital. I couldn't even fathom that there might be light at the end of the tunnel, and everything became a bit more bleak with each passing day. To cope I gave myself milestones to which I could look forward. 2-week post-op appointment, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and 6-week post-op appointment. The first few came and went fairly quietly. Christmas was a big one. Presents were sent out, the house was decorated, and there were meals to prepare for the company we invited over. Two of Wil's single soldiers called at the last minutes asking if they could bring a couple of single friends over for the Christmas dinner. I had enough food to feed the whole battalion of soldiers and was actually thrilled to have a little less leftover to deal with. It struck me as I was studying the faces of these young men, who were all injured downrange and somehow found themselves joining our table on Christmas day, how lucky I was to be sitting there with my husband, who was making a great recovery progress, and a beautifully thriving little daughter, who was, and forever will be, the light of our lives. Things could have gone bad, but they didn't. Life went on, new friends were made, and I needed to rid myself of the traumatic memories of this year. The day after Christmas, I could feel the weight of angst being washed down the shower drain knowing that the time to prepare for worst case scenario was over. Today (or technically yesterday) Wil had his 6-week post-op appointment. The surgeon was very pleased with his recovery and said that everything was exactly where it should be. Wil can now ease back into lifting things that are heavier than 10 lbs. Our baby is about 24. He can change her diaper, get her out of her crib, and pick her up when she demands a big bear hug. Not that he hasn't done that once or twice these past three months, but now I don't have to grab the phone in a panic to dial the surgeon while swearing at him for DOING THAT to us AGAIN.

He's okay.

We're going to be fine.

It's okay for me to sleep again.

Next post will resume happier writing about the cutest baby in the world doing something astonishingly adorable. And so for now, good night.

In Which I Tried to not Complain

I'm really tired of hearing myself bitch about the crappy weather, but not making a note about what happened over the weekend would totally be nuts. Last week our washing machine, which was located in the basement, just quit working mid rinse cycle. I discovered this little unpleasant fact nearly midnight when the temperature outside had dipped way below freezing already, so imagine my joy when I had to stick my hands in frigid water and hand wring a load of very wet clothes. When I started to feel like frost bite was coming on, I yelled at Wil to come down and join in on all the fun I was having in the basement. I called FMO first thing in the morning (FYI: FMO = Furniture Management Office, who loans us all major 220V appliances here since we weren't allowed to bring ours), and a sweetest lady apologetically informed me that they were so booked up during the holidays already and couldn't send a mechanic to our house until the 29th, which at the time was about 2 weeks away. I tried my best not to simultaneously laugh and cry before thanking her and hanging up. The greatest gifts my husband has ever given me, beside that Little Mutt, hands down, were our washer and dryer, because he knew how much I hated doing laundry and how much more I hated lugging our dirty laundry to the laundrymat. And there we were--five dirty laundry creators, two of whom have four paws a piece that tend to be covered in mutt and snow. I procrastinated the dreaded trip with the toddler and the gimpy husband long enough that we accrued 10 loads of laundry by Sunday when we experienced the first bad snow storm of the season (the storm didn't reach our area until we got to the laundrymat, isn't that convenient?). Couldn't postponed the trip any longer either since most of us were already out of clean socks and underwear. To my husband's credit, he singlehandedly tackled the laundry, while I drove around post looking for a place to change a poopy diaper, a task simple enough had the said child not been in a pair of snow boots, tights, a bodysuit, a snowsuit, a hat, and a pair of mittens. Do you know how hard it is to change a BAD poopy diaper on a tiny changing table in a very small public restroom with one hand while trying to keep all those article of clothing away from the crabby and hungry child's hands so she didn't shove them in poop in protest? If I had access to Wil's meds, I would have dumped the whole thing in my mouth right then. After we came out of the bathroom, we found that Santa was visiting the commissary. Chase got another picture taken with him with little fuss mainly because she was on the verge of passing out from exhaustion and hunger. I carried my baby out of the store on my shoulder, in heavy snow fall, like a sack of potatoes, and she was out cold even before I got through the drive-thru window in an attempt to feed her something other than snow. Since she was sleeping so peacefully, Wil told me to wait with Chase in the car with the heater running while he finished up the laundry. In just under an hour that I was sitting there quietly singing karaoke and looking up our moon roof, nearly 3 inches of snow quickly turned most things that were already white from the last snow even whiter and fluffier. I get it--snow is pretty to look at--but if and only if you are warm and inside. Driving back home was beyond nerve-wrecking. Having been born and raised just above the equator, I, most of all, had no business or the skill necessary to drive in red road condition. The snow was coming down so fast that the autobahn looked like it wasn't plowed at all. I ended up driving at about 25 mph the whole way home because at any higher speed our SUV would fishtail wildly. It didn't matter that we had 4-wheel drive. I could have been riding in a horse drawn buggy, and we would have spun out just the same if I was going any faster. It was a very long way home to say the least, but what ended up to be 11 loads of laundry was done! Today brought good news from the nice lady at FMO, who took pity on me after hearing about our adventurous laundry trip over the weekend, and magically found us a mechanic that could come to our house tomorrow! Maybe a working washer is our Christmas miracle this year.

I'm going to leave you with a couple of videos that probably will not be interesting to anyone besides our immediate family members, but, of course, you are more than welcome to watch these of our cute kid. Seriously, I don't think anyone can make them more precious than us. Yes, my kid is cuter than yours, and I'm not even sorry I said that. Ok, maybe very little.

Will Work for Gummies from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

And We Didn't Forget the Rest of You! from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

Pictures for Kun Yai

It's Time for Bullet Blogging

-For the first time since Wil's return from a deployment a few years ago, and my second attempt ever, I'm Christmas decorating the house. This involves hand making fresh evergreen garlands and wreaths and lots of sewing. It is as much rewarding as it is painfully slow. We just got our tree last night and might be spending today decorating it.
-Wil continues to progress in his recovery. He still needs at least 15 pills a day to get by, but he's mostly independent around the house. Still can't bend at the waist, and he will not be able to for the next 3-4 months or so, but Chase is well-trained now in picking things up for him off of the floor.

Miss Chase needs her own section:
-She is the funniest little person on earth. She says and does things that constantly crack me up and is quite a little imitator. We have to seriously watch our language around her after we overheard her saying something that sounded dangerously similar to "oh, sh*t!" while trying to figure out a piece of her toy.
-Her clean vocabulary library is expanding at an alarming rate as well and she understands and complies with most of my requests and suggestions. Her favorite word right now: money. Caught her today with a $20-bill in her hot little hand, and her father had no idea how she snatched that out of his stash. Uh oh.
-My kid loves to booty dance, especially when she's simultaneously playing her piano and keyboard while singing at the top of her lungs. Double uh oh.
-Still sleeping 12-13 hours a night, eating like no one has ever fed her before, still has a giant belly to show for it even though she is thinning out everywhere else. It boggles the mind that we'll have a two-year-old on our hands in less than 5 months.
-If you ask her "Baby, what is your name?," you will get "Che," as an answer. I can never get a good video of her anymore because, as soon as she hears the beeping noise that signals that the power is on, she runs over and demands that I turn the screen around so she can see "Che, babiee," which is always accompanied by a pointing hand gesture to her chest just to make sure that Momma doesn't confuse her with other "Che Babiee."
-I think she has 7 teeth now and is working on a molar or two? I'm not sticking my fingers in there anymore--she bites.
-Still adores her brothers and loves to cuddle with them, although has a very soft spot in her heart for...cats. I don't even know what to do with that one. We have a few friendly kitties that roam the neighborhood that she gets to pet occasionally, and yesterday Wil caved and bought her a stuffed animal--a furry big Cat, whom Papa named Charlie and Chase called "Char". Both Brutus and Paddy have already tried to kill Char a couple of times today, which resulted him needing a quick bath to get rid of the slimy slobber. Keeping Char in one piece will be challenging.
-My lovely little child is going through her naked phase. She refuses to keep her pants on when we're home and is constantly walking around the house with her pants around her ankles. She asks to be "nekkid" when she's on a changing table, and as soon as the clothes come off before bath time, she dives into the boys' bed in her naked glory. I'm pretty certain it's the highlight of her day.
-She's convinced that every time I'm in front of the computer, I'm looking at pictures/videos of babies. In her defense, many of our friends are having kids left and right and I do spend a lot of time looking at pictures/videos of them. She always demand that I let her sit on my lap and show her some "babieeee."

Wil's turn:
-Uma has gotten over a pretty bad cold/flu thing that made her very miserable and those around her did not enjoy it either. She has been crazy about this whole decorating thing, but to her credit her wreath looks awesome and the felt food that she has sewn is pretty incredible. She is crazy with so many more projects that she wants to get done before Christmas I really cant wait to see them.
- I am procrastinating on finishing my Eng. class and really should get around to it. My problem is that I only get a few min. of mindful clarity between taking my meds. My professor has been very understanding. As soon as I start to read anything I fall asleep. With Uma under the weather and not feeling up to cooking I have had my choice of what to eat lately. Now since I can not be so mobile due to my surgery this is not a good thing. I must say the whole thing about putting on weight due to the holidays, yeah that's my excuse.

One for the Book

Wil was discharged from the hospital on Sunday afternoon. I've been really busy since, sorry for the late update. I'll write more once things calm down here, hopefully by Wednesday. Chase and I are still making hospital run daily to take care of some paperwork issues, picking up medicines, and attending our own appointments. Nothing bad but I'll share more later. Wil is as comfortable as he can hope to be. He's taken to sleeping on the couch because it's much easier to try to log roll from that position and grab a walker. He can walk around the house without an aid of a walker, but I insist that he uses it anyway when I'm not around because his legs are still very weak and those pesky spasms can literally knock him to the ground. He obviously can't bend at the knees or back, and I'm learning to put things up higher so he can reach them. Chase and I were running all over town taking care of stuff and picking up the boys from the kennel yesterday and didn't get home until nearly dinner time. Wil complained that he was dizzy and light-headed and told me that all he had eaten were some animal crackers and cereal bars because those were sitting on the top shelf that he could reach. It was kind of hilarious to watch him directing Chase to pick deli meat out from the bottom drawer in our fridge. With all the practice coming our way, I'm sure we'll get a hang of things very soon.

Before I wrap this up, I would like to especially thank our dear friends who came out to visit Wil at the hospital. Most of Wil's friends were out of town for the week because of a work conference (although they came to see him as soon as they could), which made the hospital silence even more defining. If we were closer to our family, his room would have been the one getting scolded by the nurses for being loud. There would have been parents, grandmas, aunts, uncles, fussing over him, and cousins running around playing tag in the hallway 24-7. But this is our reality of being station overseas. It was a really hard week for him and I can't tell you enough how familiar friendly faces lifted his spirit. One particular family, the Carrolls, has always been there for all of us through the best and the worst of times. Jordan, Buck, and Brady, you are a Godsend! We love you so very much and are so grateful for our friendship. Can't wait until our playdate!

I can no longer post pictures here for some reason, so I guess only slide shows will do for now. When/if things ever calm down, I'll look into fixing it, but enjoy these for now, Grandparents!

Irrational Anger

I'm a pretty emotional person, and my husband will probably tell you that it's some kind of an understatement of the year. I haven't gotten it in me the ability to be upset on the inside while putting up a happy front. I cried in the hospital's cafeteria yesterday because, after a total meltdown during lunch time, Chase looked at me with tears streaming down her face and said "outsyyde (outside), pay (play), syde (slide)?" It breaks my heart that life as she knows it is so turned upside down right now and I can't exactly fix it. I hurts me that she couldn't jump, run, spin, and let out a squeal whenever her little heart desires because we're in the hospital all the time. And it absolutely kills me to know that I couldn't just drop everything, scoop her up in my arms and run her to the nearest playground when that was the only way to fix whatever that's broken in her little world. I know this is not going to last forever, but right now I'm not a very good wife and I'm not a very good mother either. I want to be there 100% for two of my most important people in the world but it's just physically impossible. Chase is not a big fan of our CDC, and I'm afraid that I just reinforce the feeling by rarely ever leaving her there. But 4 hours yesterday were much needed, and so were the other 7 today. She got to be a normal toddler, who got to "pay outsyyde" and shared blocks with her new friends. I got to go to the hospital alone, sit quietly at the edge of my best friend's bed, and rest my head on his chest. We took a quick nap together and I got to really hug him without having to worry about Chase yanking some kind of wire out of something she shouldn't. We watched a movie together, stole each other's lunches, and just hung out. It was incredibly therapeutic, and for the first time this week I didn't want to just curl up at the foot of Chase's crib and go to sleep with her at 7 p.m. The fog in my mind is very slowly lifting, and I'm realizing that I've been carrying around a lot of angst with me. As much as I'm looking forward to Wil's discharge, I'm petrified of home pain management, as it felt like we had just gone to hell and back on that boat. I feel useless and not quite enough all at the same time most days. I'm angry at the universe that we're here again less than two years after the first go round. I know we're not the only people in the world dealing with "big stuff," but it's hard to gain perspective when we're sitting in the middle of it all.

On the day of Wil's surgery, Chase and I were pretty much the only two people left in the surgical waiting room after 2 p.m. Just a few doors down was the waiting area for ICU. There were a few more people in there, and I noticed this older lady, who showered us with a sweet kind smile when she saw the paper airplane experiment Chase and I were conducting in the hallway to kill time. I just assumed that she was a family member of a retiree, until she was on her way out around 4 p.m. and stopped to chat with us. I gathered that she belonged to a local congregation and just spent her whole day sitting in the ICU waiting room and praying for the patients and their families. She asked if she could pray for our little family when she found out that Wil had already been in surgery for nearly 9 hours. She softly took my hand and Chase's and it took all that I had to swallow a hard lump in my throat and not bawl. I was so overwhelmed with anxiety yet deeply touched by the kindness of stranger, whom in that small moment did more for me than she could ever imagine. I felt peace and love and knew in my heart that everything was going to be alright. We exchanged a warm goodbye and literally fifteen minutes later Wil's surgeon came out of the OR with 5 x-rays in his hand declaring the surgery a success. I'm trying very hard to hold on to that feeling the ICU waiting room Angel gave me and keep my mind clear of negative thoughts and feelings. It's a daily, and sometimes hourly, struggle, but I'm trying.

Wil continues to slowly improve. The drainage from the surgery sites came off today and it makes laying down a taddddd bit more comfortable. The swelling in his face is quickly going down and he can see better out of his right eye. He's off the morphine drip but is still heavily depended on the intravenous one that he can get every 6 minutes with a push of a button especially after a walk. We got an all clear to walk down the hall to visit our friend Becky and baby Eli in the next ward. He did well but was most definitely ready to head back and push the morphine button HARD. The biggest challenge is getting back into bed, and today he still needs 2 nurses to help him lay back down after most bathroom breaks. He's pretty nauseated and getting Sofran to combat that so he can eat a little more. And we know no one gets a good night sleep in a hospital, so he's getting something to help with that, too. His surgeon is very pleased with his progress but will let physical therapy and Wil dictate when it's time to part with that adjustable bed.

P.S. I'm talking to you, people we don't know but keep coming back to read about our life (Iowa, Australia, etc., I'm looking at you). My husband is in the hospital and really hurt. Say something nice to him like you wish him a speedy recovery. It's a small price to pay for an admission to our freak show. I did title the post "Irrational Anger," and I'm taking it out on innocent internet bystanders.

This, Too, Shall Pass

I really honestly hate the phrase because it's only stating the obvious, but at this point I'll chant anything to myself to keep it going. Wil was wheeled into the OR yesterday soon after 7 a.m. At noon his surgeon came out and said that the scar tissues from the previous surgery were tremendous and he'd spent the last 4+ hour just trying to free up the nerves that were pressed down by the scar tissues. So it appeared that not only his new herniation was giving him a hard time and causing pain, those scar tissues from last year's surgery were also adding to the discomfort. He told me that he needed 2 more hours for the mechanical part of the surgery, although it wasn't until 4:30 p.m. when I actually saw him stepping out of the OR looking completely drained. There were some hardware issues they had to deal with, which added more time to an already complicated procedure, but all and all the surgery was declared a success as far as his being to accomplish the goals they had set out. We notified the new anesthetist ahead of time of Wil's violent reaction to coming out of anesthesia last year, and they were able to prevent the puke fest repeat. Chase and I left the hospital around 7 p.m. when Wil was moved into a shared room and already getting knocked out by a cocktail of very good drugs. I didn't really realized that we were running on adrenaline fume until this morning after we got to the hospital. Another long day there just seemed impossible, and even the usually chipper Chase was not having any of it. I knew to expect some swelling to Wil's face, because he called to warn me about it practically all night. I kind of took most of his crazy phone calls as drug-induced, and therefore not to be taken seriously, so actually seeing it was rather jarring. Apparently, he had to wear some kind of goggles during the surgery even though he was laying face down the whole time, and the pressure + drugs + unknown allergy made his face look a touch like an elephant man's mug. He also developed a few new allergies to one of the pain medications and the surgical tape adhesive, so he was all itchy and covered in small clear blisters wherever the wire and tape met on his body, which turned out to actually be quite a few spots. The nurses in Landstuhl's 8D are doing a marvelous job staying on top of his pain control and Wil's as comfortable has he can expect to be under this particular circumstance. I'm so tired I'm nodding off typing this, so I'm going to wrap it up here. The bottom line is he's doing well. The boys are at the kennel, and Chase is going to spend 4 hours tomorrow afternoon at the CDC while Wil and I tackle an important physical therapy session. We are exhausted but hopeful. Will update again as soon as I can.

From Wil.

We have talked about the future and we are both scared. This is the first real "career" I have had, and I have had it for 11 years. This is the only thing I have really known. After about 6 years you get sort of institutionalized into the system. I will never get fired, I will always have health care, I will always have a place to live, my family will always be taken care of, I will always have college for free, and many, many more perks that is hard to give up. Man, I could have been a recruiter. I really do love the Army, but I am excited about the future and we shall see where it takes us.
I do plan a trip to http://www.edelweisslodgeandresort.com/ this winter for Uma. She can by all means hit the slopes for a few days while Chase and I relax in the pool, but there will be a day when Chase goes to the child care and I hit the spa for a day. Enjoy those runs honey, cause Im getting an all day massage. Nobody should worry about the whole surgery thing really, Im sure everything will be fine, and yes I will be laid up for a little while but Ill be fine, Really!

First Thoughts on Monday

This is the last full week Wil has before the surgery. I'm both ready for it to come and dreading it all at the same time, as I'm sure he is. On Friday we trekked back to Landstuhl, so the brace shop people could make a minor adjustment to Wil's current back brace (they just ended up giving him a better looking and fitting one). While we were there, they suggested that he should also go ahead and get a measurement done for the brace he was going to need after the surgery. It didn't really hit me what we were in for until I saw what Wil will have to wear. It's basically a solid sheet of clear hard plastic formed into a full upper body cast. He will not be able to sit in it because it runs a bit pass his hips. So it's either standing or laying down for a least 4 weeks, and I'm pretty sure I know what he'll do. I'd like to think that my brain is trying to spare me the anxiety of what's to come by blurring my memory of the last surgery and recovery, much like it does with child birth. I was 7 months pregnant, had a terrible sciatica, and was mostly alone taking care of him and the boys. Our friends kindly took the boys out for us a couple of times and dropped off dinners that saved us from yet another take out, but mostly it was just us four all cramped together on that mattress I dragged out from the guest room to the living room. Thankfully, the surgery was relatively small, in comparison to this one, and he was able to walk around the house unaided after coming home from the hospital. It was mentally and emotionally draining all the same having to watch My Rock be in so much pain. That's why when he felt good enough to fix our fence, for the 7th time, on Saturday, I didn't try to stop him. He needed to be the man of the house and take care of us, plus, let's face it, the polezei might just take my kids away if they get out one more time. We have talked about our fears and worries, and I'm trying my best to push them out of my head because this time around there's no room for woe-is-me moments. I've got a baby, a house, two mutts who think fencing is a personal challenge, and a husband who will have to endure a 10-hour surgery that will result in him in a body cast for at least 4 weeks afterward. I've got 8 days to psych myself up for all of it. Already told him that after all is over and done with, I'm going skiing while he mans our homestead and unruly children.

Medically-Induced OCD?

There's one medicine that Wil takes that is like a miracle drug. It eliminates his leg pain and allows him to be able to walk and stand and sit upright. The upsides are obvious. Our nosy neighbors probably don't even suspect that anything is wrong when they see him hopping in and out of a driver's seat of our car like it's nothing. He's able to drive himself around now because he feels so great on this particular med that he doesn't have to take any of the narcotics that our livelihood depended on last week. Since last Friday, when he first started the medicine, Wil's been a busy nesting bee. The house is always cleaned and orderly and there's never a basket of dirty laundry to speak of. Let me tell you that is not anywhere in the realm of normal in this house. We have a toddler who has a tornado effect on anything and everything in her path, but you probably will never be able to tell because her father is practically walking behind her picking up whatever piece of toy she just tosses. It was nice for a few days when I didn't have to lift a finger to do anything around the house, but it became obvious quickly that something was not quite right with my live-in Martha Stewart. During the day Wil was just all too chipper and hyper for someone wearing a back brace and he would stay up nearly all night reorganizing the pantry and our storage area in the basement. He does all of these things with a crazy high in his eyes. I think he just dismissed me as being over reactive when I woke up and started loudly screaming at him for moving an armoire up from the basement and our hallway bench downstairs--all by himself--while the rest of us were asleep. This is a man who couldn't stand on his own feet just a week ago, mind you. He finally realized that something was off while he was at the food court by himself yesterday and kept adjusting his food tray and its liner because they weren't exactly at 90˚. As it turns out, the medicine, which is often used to treat Obsessive Compulsive Disorder amongst many other things, can actually cause a user, who does not have the condition, to start exhibiting symptoms of OCD and become hyperactive. How do you like that predicament? He spoke to his 1SG, who was prescribed the same med a while ago for his back issue, and he told Wil that, while he was on the medicine, he took to wallpaper a room and dug a new space to hide all the wires and pipes in one night. I'm going to hide all the paint and brushes just in case. Oh, one more thing. He had a rather unpleasant test done in Urology on Tuesday to reveal that the nerve damage from his back issue is affecting his bladder control. This is not entirely a surprise, although I really don't want to find out anymore what other organs are also affected and not doing so hot. This surgery can't come soon enough.

I don't like that our blog just gets more depressing with each update, so here's a video to offset that. Chase spotted this hat while we were at a baby flea market, and she immediately snatched it and refused to remove it from her head. I'm not sure what the fascination was but it's worth more than a quarter or two we spent on it to keep her happy while I sorted through boxes of new-to-her clothes. Last night as we were getting her ready for bed, she saw the hat in her dresser and started running around the house with it. And her first nickname, Chimpy Chase, should have prepared us for her turning every single thing in the house into a jungle gym, but it really doesn't. She's literally inches away from being able to reach our chandelier once she climbs up on the dinning room table. And to think that I was ever worried about my late-walker child. For some reason, I just can't post pictures right now, and it looks like it's a known Blogger issue. Grandmas take note--I tried.

A Wave of Crazy from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

Party Pooper

We didn't dress Chase up for Halloween this year. Seriously, at this age, it's really for the parents, isn't it? I have no desire to deal with keeping a bucket of candy away from Chase and fighting a possible tantrum, so I didn't feel entirely too bad about it. I didn't grow up Trick-or-Treating and believed that we just had ourselves 2 full weeks of plenty of horror and nightmares, so when Wil actually felt good enough to take over the house work and the care of the Mutt, I was more than happy to just hang out around the house and fall asleep on the couch in the middle of the day instead of braving the cold and having to concoct a last minute costume. There were some German kids that came around asking for candy, which we were going to buy had we actually made it to the grocery store today, so I suggested that Wil passed out clementines instead. He looked at me like I was nuts, but I would be more than thrilled if someone gave Chase a piece of fruit next year instead of just another piece of candy. Ok, let's talk about the kids for a minute. What is up with the teenagers who are not even dressed up and running around pestering neighbors for candy? Since we are in Germany, where Trick or Treat is not a tradition (as also in Thailand), there were relatively few coming around knocking on our door. But most of them were not in costumes and just there for the candy? How lame!

So an update on Wil's condition? Since it's 6 o'clock here and I just really want to take a quick nap before the baby rises for the day, I'll just tell you the short version of it. If you are following us on Facebook, you already know what happened (yes, Mom, it's a hint for you to get a FB account, so I can finally ditch the blog). After a slight arm twisting from neurosurgery, the OR people finally decided that they could actually open up a surgery date for Wil instead of footing $700/day for inpatient care for nearly two months. His surgery is set for November 17th, and it will be a marathon of a day. That was the biggest problem--to find a day when the OR was completely free because his surgery will start early in the morning and will not end until nearly early evening. It's scary but we're beginning to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Our dear friend Geoff, who just had a back surgery himself recently, suggested a drug for Wil to try that had worked well for him, and what do you know!?! After being on it for only 2 days, he was able to walk, with a help of a back brace, like a normal human being and was mostly back to his old self again. He felt so great he cleaned the whole house (and vacuumed the ceiling!), did the laundry, and took care of the baby, while I feebly put up a relatively weak protest from the comfort of the couch just before snoozing off pretty much all day. We were going to meet with our friends for Trunk or Treat in Sembach, but I didn't want to interrupt his cleaning madness. He said it felt great to actually be useful and do something around the house, who was I to argue otherwise?

Joy Rising

Properly naming a Thai baby is a science that involves the exact birth time and planetary alignment, which will ultimately end up in some kind of calculation that will tell the person naming the kid which letters/vowels to use and which to avoid in order to allow the baby to prosper and reach his/her full potential. And it always has some kind of complicated meaning behind it. So imagine my parents' surprise when I told them that the baby was to be called, simply and beautifully, Chase. I was not one of those who knew all my life what I would name all my twelve kids since I was five. In fact, I barely gave it any thoughts since she didn't seem to mind being called "The Mutt" while in utero. I wasn't keen on girlie girl names because the meaning behind them were always "the beautiful one," "the fair one," or something of similar nature. I knew the baby I was carrying would be beautiful, but her looks alone would not be the most memorable and remarkable thing about her. My hope for the baby, whom never seemed to rest until the day she entered the world, was for her to know that, with hard work, she was capable of anything and everything. I hoped she would be kind, sweet, humble, and know her place in the world--know how lucky she was to be born into a loving family and still worked hard to pay it forward. I hoped she would be a healthy, happy, curious, vibrant little girl, who always carried a go-getter attitude and never gave up just because someone told her that she couldn't do it. I read somewhere that Chase meant "hunter" in old English and I thought it fit my Little Mutt to a T. These past 18 months have been the most extraordinary time. Chase is the light of my life and lately she's been my strength. The mischievous grin in her big brown eyes was really the only thing that kept me going all last week. I was watching Oprah the other day and one of her audience members used the term "joy rising" to describe his feeling about a flash mob in Chicago, and I thought it was such a fantastic and accurate way to articulate something indescribable. Joy rising is how I feel when I look at my baby--my little Hunter. It's been a really long time since I posted pictures of her, so here they all are. As always, put the cursor on the picture to see the caption, if you so choose.

Please continue to keep Wil in your thoughts and prayers. We go to Homburg tomorrow and hope to get a surgery date soon after that. I'll report back soon.

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Just when I thought I had figured out the med combination to keep Wil comfortably out of it during the day, his pain level increased. There was nothing else for me to do but letting him have whatever he needed every couple of hours, because the alternative was just inhumane. After yet another long night of agony and the morning that wasn't much better and lots of pills, I finally saw my husband again. Wil asked me a few days ago what he did to upset me so because I had been so incredibly short and mean to him, and I sobbed when the answer came. I am so mad that he's in pain and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. I keep a diligent schedule of his medication in hope that there will be an emerging pattern that will keep me on top of his pain cycle. I pester his doctor and PA. I research everything under the sun to see if there's anything else I can do, and yet every slow minute creeps on by with him in pain even more so than the last. I'm frustrated, useless, and taking it out on the only person my anger should have never touched. People often comment about my strength and I can honestly tell you that I would love to just curl up in a fetal position and play dead until this nightmare blows over. But that is not an option. There is no alternative to being present for my family. Wil and I have certainly gone through hard times in our relationship, but we always come out of it together and stronger. Even in his most fragile moments, he's showing me grace and always puts me and Chase above his own needs. It's hard right now but there's nowhere else I'd rather be.

The Longest Week

I'm exhausted this morning as it's been a really tough long night for Wil. Here's a quick recap of what's been going on these past couple of days:

Right after Wil was discharged from the hospital, we had to walk around to pick up his records and MRI for his second-opinion consult. He started to complain that his right foot was a little sore, but I didn't much of it as it looked fine and it was the first time he was really on his feet in a few days. That night it became a little swollen and we put ice on it thinking that he might have hit the bed rail or kicking something on the way to the bathroom when he was so completely dopey and just didn't realize it until now. The next morning I mentioned it to his PA while we were on the phone discussing Wil's medication, and eventually he became concerned enough that it might have been a blood clot and asked me to bring him in to the ER as soon as I could. I called Wil's coworker and our friend Brad to take him to the ER while I dropped the boys off at a kennel before meeting up with them at the hospital. Naturally, the half an hour journey to the kennel turned into a hour and a half after two detours. I was almost running out of gas with no cellphone reception while poor Wil was rushed through ultrasound, which thankfully showed no blood clots. By the time Chase and I got there, Wil was laid out on a bed in the ER looking completely miserable. The next thing I knew I saw a white coat flying by me and heard:

Wil (in a completely dopey voice pointing Chasey-style): Heyyyy, Dr. Freedman!
White Coat: Look, we need to have a hard talk right now, ok? You CAN NOT keep coming in here taking up a hospital bed and sucking on narcotics.
Wil (staring at me in confusion and blinking repeatedly): Er...I'm not here for my back. It's my foot (pointing, again).
White Coat (slowly turning a white shade of pink): What? Ummm...looks like I had gotten some bad information.
Me, who had been standing in the room the whole time: Hello, I'm Uma, his wife.

And that was my first introduction to his surgeon, Dr. Freedman. Even though I had heard so much about him, it was just then I got to truly appreciate what a jackass he really was. So I suppose this was the real reason why he discharged my husband early, even though the PA had wanted to try 9 doses of powerful anti-inflammatory drug that could only be given to him via IV. My husband refused his surgery options and he wanted him out of his hospital before draining any more of his precious narcotics. I was beyond delighted that Wil's approved referral for a second opinion came through yesterday. That means that his appointment with a German neurosurgeon at Homburg University Hospital will be set up very soon (hopefully be early next week). I don't want that Jackass holding anything remotely sharp around my husband, even if it's for a splinter removal.

Anyhow, we found out that the cause of his swollen, and very red by the time I got to the ER, foot was an acute onset of gout. The simplistic theory is that his liver has been working over time breaking down all the meds and narcotics and is not doing a very good job keeping up with uric acid, which ultimately caused the crystals to form around his foot. Gout is congenital but a lot of people carry the genes all their lives and will never exhibit the symptom. Right now the condition in Wil's body is just ripe for this nasty disease to rear its ugly head. He's taking more pills to take care of this and hopefully there will never be another episode with a controlled diet, which he loudly protests CONSTANTLY. His nurse is very tired and rather short-tempered right now.

The kids are doing well. I'm constantly amazed at how resilient Chase is. In spite of perpetual interruption to her schedule and routine, she's maintained her sweet nature and rarely has a meltdown that doesn't go away quickly with a big hug and kisses from Papa, from whom she refuses to be apart. I decided to board the boys because they really need to go have fun and be taken care of by the people we trust to look after them like they were their own pups while we sort out this mess. Plus I really can't take the guilt of not having anytime to spend with them right now. Night time pain management remains the biggest struggle for us as I haven't yet found the right combination of meds to keep Wil comfortable throughout the night, although we're doing much better during the day.

So here's us in a nutshell. I know these long tough days won't last forever and we are blessed with dear friends and family members, who constantly call and write to check on us and give words of encouragement that are much needed at times. Another surgery is just around the bend, and as odd as it sounds, we can't wait until it happens! I'll do my best to keep you posted via the blog, but it's most convenient for me right now to do a quick status update on Facebook. Now I'm gonna take a quick nap before the next round of pain and meds start again. Hope things are better on your end.

Update*** We got an appointment to see another neurosurgeon at Homburg University Hospital next Wednesday! This is great news!

Here We Go Again

Wil was discharged today when he shouldn't have been. There's a story to go with that but my combined 8 hours of sleep in the past 3 nights are not doing much to screen out strings of curse words that are swirling in my head. The surgeon's ego was hurt because we asked for a second opinion and now my husband is whimpering on the couch even though he's taken 4 different and very powerful painkillers and narcotic. I know exactly where I will be and whom shall feel my wrath bright and early even before he's fully awake. We more than likely will be seeing the inside of the hospital before sunrise. I'm going to let Wil sleep for a few more hours before making that call to wake up the kid and load us all up again. Seriously, I'm going to be that Major's worst nightmare tomorrow. He should have thought twice before screwing with my family.

Wil's Hospitalization

This is not exactly the kind of blog update I had wanted to share, but cute baby pictures and video will just have to wait. If you are my Facebook friends, you probably are up to date, but here's the lowdown: Wil came home from work Thursday complaining of increased pain and discomfort in his lower back. Since the surgery last year, he's had good days and bad days, and we just sort of chalked it off as a bad one. We had planned to travel and Wil took a pass for a 4-day weekend, but we decided to use the extra days to just rest and relax. He toughed it out and went shopping with us around K-town, but by Saturday it became very clear that this was not going away and getting rapidly worse. He had taken more pain killers on Saturday than he had since the surgery and still could not get any kind of relief at all. At this point, he was unable to stand, walk, or sit up. We started Sunday morning in the emergency room, and 7 hours later he was admitted for pain management. Monday morning came the xrays, MRI, and CT scan, which were all very painful to him since standing or sitting up still caused Wil excruciating pain. We saw his PA this afternoon and found out that the degenerative disc that he had the operation on last year had REALLY reherniated and was pinning the nerve root. The PA was surprised to see that Wil was able to lift his foot about 3" off of the bed at all because the scans looked THAT bad. The doctors are trying to come up with the right mix of drugs and narcotics to control his pain to the point that he could come home to wait for the surgery, which could still be anywhere in the neighborhood of 3 weeks away. We'll find out more about which procedure it will be and exactly when the surgery will happen as the week goes on. Right now they don't expect to release him before Thursday. Chase, the boys, and I are doing as well as can be expected. Chase was very confused and scared of every nurse and doctor, who came into the room to stick needles in Wil's arm or move him in any kind of fashion. She yelled "Papa" immediately and repeatedly and reached for him when someone approached. If I took her out of the room, she would scream for him until she could physically see him again. Today was better, as the nurses lavished her with popsicles and I kept stuffing her snacktrap with animal crackers. The boys are unfortunately getting an extremely short end of the stick, minus the whole pain issue, as Chase and I leave for the hospital early in the morning and don't come home until just before her bedtime. Paddy nearly broke his legs sprinting up from the basement to the kitchen, where I was playing back a message on the answering machine left by Wil. I wish I could make them understand what's going on and that he would come home soon. I'm probably not going to have much energy type up long updates here but will keep up with Facebook. Thank you for your kind words and prayers. It stinks right now but I know everything will be alright. Please continue to keep my Beloved in your thoughts and prayers.

Two Words

STOMACH FLU.

The Baby Did It

Chase was fiddling with the blog and tried to get rid of our comment service, but, naturally, she was a baby and didn't know HTML and muddled it all up. Anyway, we're working on fixing it now and wanting to tell you that we are not deleting your comments on purpose.

Why the Light Update?

Sharing what she stole from the recycle bin with Brutus.

The view is better from the top.

Apparently, the best seat in the house.

Clearly did not approve the way I wasted the cabinet space.

And these are just the non-dangerous stuff that I was able to grab the camera for. This past week I've found her on the kitchen counter (she learned to push a step stool up to the cabinet to climb up), scaling a small slope in our backyard up to the patio all by herself, getting out of her swing while it was in motion, and trying to ride both dogs. Beginning to pity me, aren't you?

Sliding Love

I'm in soooo much trouble now.

Sliding Love from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

I know this is blogging lite, but you can't blame me for wanting to soak up every last bit of the warm sunshine and clear blue sky before the horrid winter creeps in on us, can you? We're heading out to Bad Dürkheim Wurstfest, which bills itself as the largest wine festival in Germany, this afternoon. I love that we're only 40 minutes away from the gorgeous Deutsche Weinstrasse now, and just the thought of it gives me a warm buzz. Wine and processed meat....hmmmmmm. I so heart the German harvest season.

P.S. My dear buddy Mari's husband, Gabe, is finally safely back home with his precious family after 15 long months in Iraq. Welcome home, Gabe! Thank you, Gabe, Mari, Caroline, and Annabelle, for your services and sacrifice! We can't wait to see the pictures of the reunion! I've got a giant box of Kleenex ready to go...

A Few Trips in Pictures

Pooped

I'm still adjusting to caring for a busy toddler, who now only naps once a day. I know a lot of moms will roll their eyes at me when reading this, but Chase had the same routine of 2-3 naps a day since she was about 5 months old and we loved it! She's still speed teething and cutting her 5th tooth in 7 days as I type. It's so weird to think that last week she only had her 2 bottom ones and now there are nearly 5 more on the top row as well. There's the biggest and most adorable gap between her top two bucky beaver teeth. I love her new smile as much as I miss her gummy one.

Here's a video that was shot a few weeks ago. Our little baby is a bit obsessed with her hand sanitizer, and we have to hide the bottle from her or she would ask for it constantly. I think she already looks so different from when this video was taken. Sigh.

Nurturing Her Inner Germaphobe from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

The child is literally growing like a weed and learning new words and signs everyday. Her new responsibilities are opening and closing the door for the boys when they want to go outside or come in. All I have to do is ask her to get the door for the boys and she'll hop to it, which proves to be a welcoming distraction for that one minute that I need to warm up a sippy cup of soy milk for her in the morning now that we stopped breastfeeding. 16 months and 6 days of the most wonderful experience that I will always treasure.

I have lots of pictures to post but we have a bit of an issue with our hard drive at the moment. Hang tight, Grandparents. She's worth the wait :).

Be Maddie's Friends!

I landed on Heather's blog one late night after clicking on one link after another about a month ago. I've been a faithful follower since although it wasn't until today that I finally left her my comment. I struggled to come up with the right words to tell her how horribly sorry I was that her beautiful baby girl Madeline was no longer with us but realized that no such words existed. I wish that we lived close enough that I could bring her dinner and give her a hug. We donated a small amount of money in Maddie's memory to benefit the family of NICU babies (please read about Friends of Maddie here), but Maddie has inspired me to do more. I'm in the process of completing my first quilt for Chase (one of her Christmas presents) and will be joining Rheinland-Pfalz Quilt Guild in making baby quilts for their Baby Love outreach program. The end of the year is coming up quickly along with what sure to be a busy and happy family time for many of us. I just would like you to keep Friends of Maddie in mind when/if you feel the urge to contribute to a charitable organization. Thanks for being our friends and, hopefully, Maddie's!

I Pledge

*This post is brought to you by Wil.*

I do not consider myself political. I am probably one of the most laid back people you will ever meet, but there is a video going around really causing a stir of emotions to put it lightly among different people. I have watched the video a few times now to see whats the big deal. It actually reminds me of one of the most enduring speeches from one of our Presidents that our country seems to rally around. Anyone remember JFK "Ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for you country". Well everybody seems to take the stand that the President works for you. Alright, so he being so far removed from your everyday life how do you fix whats around you? You take a pledge to fix what you can where you can and by doing so make your world a better place. This video is not satanic or any kind of throw back to Adolph Hitler, (which is just crazy, REALLY). Im tired of living in fear, get over it, move on, and do something good for the world. Your telling me that by pledging to recycle, I'm actually saying hail hitler. REALLY!?!



I pledge my service to My World, My Country, My President, and by doing so make this place better for my family and the generations to come.

No Time for Real Blogging

In the past week:
-Chase has given up her morning nap and is apparently cutting the top two teeth, rendering the remaining afternoon nap rather miserable and restless. Momma is exhausted.
-Wil has gone through yet another torturous test to reveal the first good news that the nerves in his leg are not permanently damaged! Hooray for good news!
-It's been very warm and we're spending a lot of time outside by the baby pool in the backyard.
-Chase had to stay at the CDC for a few hours while I had a follow up appointment with my dear optometrist, who re-examined my corneas and told me that they looked 80% better. Still have to wear glasses for a few more weeks though. Sigh. Also, my left eye is so bad (-11.75!!!), most companies don't even carry my prescription, so she's ordering me a freebie customized pair to try. Bless her.
-Now that we're free to leave the house in the morning since our kid doesn't want to nap anymore, we've been traveling! There's always a sliver lining!

To see the captions for each picture, just put your cursor on it. Gotta go now, Kid is crying. Hope you enjoy our summer pics!

Someone Should Take Phone Privilage from My Mother

Do you know how many phone calls and emails I got in a week about my lack of blog update from my mother? In seven days, she was averaging about 1.5 phone calls a day to pester me about my not putting up new pictures of her grandbaby. Mom, you are a total blog bully! I was busy! And for that I should hold this video hostage for a long time, but I'm a kind and sweet daughter--remember that!

Bubbles from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

I have loads of pictures to post but I'm just sitting on them for fun because I love harassing phone calls. Not really, MOM, don't call me about that. I gotta go. My kid has taken up a new wake up time of 7:15 a.m. Oh, how I will mourn thee, 8 o'clock.

Weekend Fun

We took full advantage of a warm and gorgeous weekend and spent most of our waking moments outside. Saturday started with our usual weekend stroll through the fields in our village. We stopped and picked a whole lot more wild blackberries than we did last weekend. I don't think any of us had eaten this much blackberries in our lives, and Chase is about to max out on her quota. She will take a long blink before deciding whether or not to open her mouth for one if it's offered. The novelty hasn't quite worn off for me just yet. I grew up a city girl and being able to pick fruits along the walking path was just something I read about. I always romanticized a quiet life in the country and have to say that actually living in our little farming village is even more amazing that I could possibly imagine. I love that the first animals Chase gets to visit on an almost daily basis don't live in the zoo and our truly "organic" produces don't come from the store. Anyhow, we had planned to take the boys to the lake for a swim that afternoon but postponed it until Sunday after an eventful morning pretty much did we all in. This was our first visit to Ohmbachsee (Ohmbach Lake), although I've been wanting to take the boys there for a year now. It was a lot smaller than I had anticipated, perhaps because I was used to the size of Mott Lake on Ft. Bragg. Nonetheless, the boys had fun swimming and making new friends, and we all enjoyed our first picnic as a family. And, of course, more wild blackberries on the trail around the lake were a big plus :). We wrapped up Sunday with a Thai dinner at home and a quick visit to our favorite gelato shop in town. Wil told one of his coworkers about our weekend activities, and his reply was "what kind of fantasies are you guys living in?!?" Ha! I don't know about fantasies, but life certainly has been very good to us this year in our beloved village of Langmeil.

As for the update on Wil's back, there's not much to share at the moment. He had the first steroid injection on Tuesday, which caused him quite a bit of pain for the following few days and, as we expected, doesn't seem to do him much good so far. He's doing well and continues to stay active, but I definitely get a bit more paranoid when he makes funny faces when moving around. He's been getting calls from my darling parents, who are worried sick about him, just about every other day, even though I keep telling them that not much changes from day to day right now. And I find it most adorable that my sweet father, who never uttered a word in English when I was living at home, is now calling to talk to Wil himself. I knew my family loved him, but our trip home in June really solidified their relationship. I mean, my dad learned and practiced another language just so he could chat with his son-in-law! That is pretty awesome in my book.

Now, onto some pictures and videos--the reasons why you are really here anyway, right?
:)

Brutus and his charge.

Chase has recently rediscovered her bouncy seat and loves to climb in with a book to read.

See you at the pool!
Her first time in the baby pool that I got on ramsteinyardsales for $5.
And let's not forget this adorable swimsuit that cost me 50 cents at Vogelweh's baby flea market.
Showing Papa bubble blowing technique.

Loves to read AND make a mess.

Ohmbachsee!


In case anyone ever wonders what's beneath all of Brutus' poof. The answer: not much.
Someone's getting tired...
Seriously, Parents, let's talk about getting me to bed.

Sometimes in the the middle of winter, you'll be thanking me for making you skip that morning nap and spend this glorious day outside.

And, of course, a blackberry video:

Blackberries from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

This one was shot after we came home from Wil's tuesday appointment at the hospital. Perhaps you can tell that the anaesthesia was beginning to wear off? Chase is far too big for her bumbo chair now, but she's obsessed with climbing in and out of anything within her reach.

Bathroom Fun from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

Asking her to identify different body parts has become one of our favorite games to distract her from a long car ride, and she's really good at it. I'll see if I can get it on video tomorrow.

Wil's Back Stuff

Wil started complaining of pain and discomfort in his lower back, which were similar to those he experienced before the surgery last February, around early spring. I think we both were hoping for the best but knew in the back of our minds that his back would not start hurting again if all were well. I should mention that the surgery only eliminated the numbness in his leg and foot, prevented further nerve damage, but did not change the way his back felt, so he has been living with what he rates as a 4 on a pain scale everyday since. This round of pain is on top of that. Well, after a few postponed MRIs, xrays, and a long wait, Wil finally got to hear the result of his MRI that was done in June. The verdict: a re-herniated disc and some scar tissues pinching more nerves. Before the last surgery, his wonderful surgeon sat him down and told him that the possibility of this happening again was likely in his case as the problematic disc was degenerative (he called it a "sick" disc). We knew Wil would need to have at least one more surgery down the road, and I was really hoping for wayyyyyy down the road. So now the next step is to go through the motion of physical therapy and wide array of therapeutic injections, neither of which worked for him the last time so we are not hanging too much hope on these. He already started physical therapy last week and will get his first set of injection today. Chase and I will be spending the afternoon with him at the hospital and drive him back home after he gets a dose of steroid in the spine. Good times. Will report back later.

Falkenstein Castle Medieval Fest

We went to a medieval festival at Falkenstein castle, which conveniently located in the next village over from ours. The weather was perfect--cool and overcast with no rain. We've been in Germany, and therefore away from the sun, long enough that the bright direct sunlight is actually unpleasant. We drove a few minutes from our house, parked in a pasture by a really pretty farm house, and then rode the bus up a really big hill to the castle. I have to admit that I always thought that medieval fests were kind of nerdy, even though I never actually attended one before. I was absolutely thrilled to be proven wrong, because it was the most fun we've had in a long time! There were so many knights in chainmails carrying around giant swords and axes. And I'm sure all the ladies were thankful for the cooling clouds because they were under some serious layers and head gears. It was so cool and really was like stepping back in time.

The food was great and the music was amazing! Chase totally rocked out and would have thrown her diaper on the stage had we let her.

A Total Medieval Rock Band Groupie from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

We came home and enjoyed some quiet cuddle time before bed together. Chase loves to brush her teeth right now and always insists that I do as well. My oral hygiene has never been better since we're brushing pretty much every time one of us has to go to the bathroom for any reason at all. Also, she's learning her animal sounds and it's freaking adorable.

Brushing Her Teeth from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

All and all, a perfect Saturday!

Sunday was determined not to be outdone and we saw horses, donkeys, goats, and a crane on our evening walk. I was beyond excited to see wild blackberries along our walking trail and picked enough to fill Chase's snack container. She ate the whole lot even before we made our way back home. I also got to taste some wild plums that were growing in the same area, and they were just delicious! I'm bring a giant bucket with us on our next walk. I feel truly blessed to have found our house in this little village that I have grown to love so much!

On Her Own Terms

On Her Own Terms from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

Chase's EDIS Visit

I started this post a few days ago but haven't gotten the time to finish, and you'll see why in a minute. The EDIS physical therapist paid us a visit on Wednesday. I felt a little silly making Chase the appointment to be evaluated for her slow walking progress, but it really started because of her new pediatrician. Our beloved Dr. Gardner up and left while we were in Thailand, probably because she knew that we would hang on to her legs, me on one and Chase on the other, pleading for her to stay in Germany with us had we been in town during her pcs. Anyway, we met with the new physician, who was more than professional and kind to my child, but he was a) not Dr. Gardner and b) kind of made me feel like it was my babying Chase that caused her delayed walking. I won't go into it, but I dialed EDIS as soon as I got home even though I knew it in my heart that my brilliant child was perfect the way she was.

Fast forward to Wednesday when I was a touch nervous about the visit because I knew how timid Chase could be around new people. Having a professional come to our house, where Chase was most comfortable and relaxed unlike most of the playgroups we attended, to evaluate the way we played was such a wonderful idea. Chase had just woken up from her nap and was in a really good mood when the therapist showed up. Ms. Angela was very knowledgeable, kind, and obviously very good with children, and Chase took to her right away. Together, they colored, stacked rings and legos, and she showed me a few ways to play with Chase that would also help strengthing her balance and lengthen those toddling steps. Speaking of toddling, I thought it was hilarious that Chase was standing and taking steps during Ms. Angela's whole visit as if to say "I told you I would do it when I was good and ready." Typical Chaster fashion. So at the end of the visit, the therapist showed me her evaluation score card, which basically indicated that everything was perfectly fine. Even with her slow walking, she was still within the average range for this age group. She was quite impressed with her signing and vocabulary, which made momma beamed extra brightly. One of the questions she had was about the words Chase knew. It actually took me a little while to answer, since I had never written them all down, so here's my opportunity to note her progress:

Words that Chase can speak at 15 months: Mamma, Papa, Paddeeee, Brrruuu (Brutus), no, mine, eyyyyee (eyes), nos (nose), schoooos (shoes), duc (rubber ducky), outsyyy (outside), hyyyyyyy (hi!), bye, mmmmmmm (eat and yum), Yais (Kun Yai--grandma in Thai), Tha (Kun Tha--grandpa in Thai), Non (my brother), hut (hat), sanwid (sandwich), wing (swing). I think that's it but might be missing a few.

Signs that she knows and uses regularly: Papa, elephant, bird, fan, banana, pineapple, dog, music, hot, bath, eat, more, fly, cloud, tree, sandwich. *Of course, I forgot her first sign ever, milk.*

Signs that she recognizes but can't sign them herself yet: flowers, bug, please, thank-you, momma, cat, chicken, bee, airplane, orange, grass.

She can identify her eyes, nose, ears, and mouth when ask where they are and would gladly poke you in the eyes and shove her fingers in your nose to show you yours as well. She loves to dance, climb, and, most of all, read. Her favorite book right now is "Big Red Barn", but last month it was "All Aboard for Dreamland!," which she conned her father into reading to her at least 3 times before bed every night in addition to the other 10 times I got dragged into it during the day. She would climb into her chair to read by herself for most of the time I need to make a quick dinner. Her brothers are her best friends and fierce protectors, and she has her Papa tightly wrapped around her chubby little pinkie.


The lights of my life.

Ever So Generous

Chase loveeeeesss to feed the boys, but she also loves food just as much as they do. She knows that the boys, and especially Paddy, will eat just about anything. So this is what happened when I mixed whole wheat, no-sugar-added Chex with a bit of gold fish crackers and gave them to her in the Snack-Trap. Momma didn't raise no silly baby! I'm now going to get a message from my mother about the double-negative sentence I just used...

Sort of Sharing from UMA STEINHAUER on Vimeo.

These two have such a special relationship. Just today when Paddy went downstairs to lay down after his breakfast, Chase crawled from room to room looking for him and yelling "Paddeeee....Paddeeee." And as soon as he heard her calling, he sprinted up the stairs to lick her face.

In other news, guess who toddled a couple of steps toward me when I waved a cereal bar in front of her face (I did say she was a pig)? Just in time for our physical therapist visit in a couple of hours....

P.S. The blog is not going private for about another week or so to give time for our friends and families to send me their email addresses, so that I won't get a frantic long distant phone call in the middle of the night telling me that my blog is broken. I'm looking at you, Peeps. We absolutely love connecting with old friends and making new ones via our blog, and it's really a shame that we have to go private for now.

Time to Go Private

I've been back and forth on the decision whether to make our blog private for a long time now. I put up the site meter just to get an idea of what kind of traffic we were attracting, and thankfully most have been our friends and families. But there are a few frequent and regular visitors that I can't really pinpoint, so I'm just going to take care of that nagging feeling I have now. There will only be more pictures and videos of the Kid, and I like knowing who's looking at them. If you would like to continue reading our blog, please kindly leave your email address for me in the comment section and I'll add you to the invited readers.