I Left My Heart in Thailand

We arrived back in Germany on Friday. It was very hard for me to say goodbye to my family again. Admittedly, the first few weeks without Wil there was rough. Chase was very well-adjusted but I could not say the same for myself. I didn't plan for us to do anything until Wil joined us and sometimes was bored out of my mind just hanging around the house with Chase after everyone went back to work. Things much improved after my Best Bud arrived. Together, even the most mundane things were entertaining and fun. We went on afternoon dates a lot since the babysitters-grandparents practically shoved us out of the door everyday after we put the baby down for her nap. It was weird to leave the house without a diaper bag and all the baby gears. I even bought a purse just to put my stuff in when we were out and about without a baby. If you know me well, you know that's a giant leap. We shopped, ate, ate, ate again, saw lots of beautiful places, and generally enjoyed being babied by the parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles. I introduced Wil to my "little" cousins, whom now towered over me and either in college or about to be. I came from a huge family and poor Wil was having the worst time keeping our family tree in his head straight. He'll tell his version of our trip later with his very own post. I have tried very hard to find the right words for our experience and don't think they will ever come easily because I'm still very emotional. I miss my parents and my siblings. I miss my grandmas and all of their fussing over me and the baby. I miss hanging out with my aunts, uncles, and cousins. I hated leaving my grandpa again because I knew he would be a little more quiet and frail the next year although his smile would always be sweet and assuring. I felt selfish taking the baby away. She was the apple of everyone's eyes and the bell of the ball everywhere we went. Dad and Chase loved napping together and the baby took to mom immediately and they were the best of pals. I truly do believe that Chase saved many of her firsts for the right time, and being there in Thailand surrounded by love, she abandoned her previously preferred mode of transportation (rolling) for some serious crawling and cruising, learned to stand on her own and probably on the verge of taking her first steps, talked all day with her imaginary friends and had real conversations with the rest of us, ate far more mangos, durians, rambutans, papayas, and mangosteens than she probably should have, attended her first fencing match and cheered on her uncle with screams and fist pumps, loved all of my mom's crazy dogs and called them all "Boooozzzz," had her first swimming lesson in the same pool that I splashed around in as a child during our family vacation and enjoyed playing with and eating sand on 4 different beaches, and had her first haircut by her great-grandmother. The list goes on and on and she will surely miss having at least 3 pairs of hands fighting over which got to hold her first. I ached for the boys everyday, but, at the same time, never wanted to leave. We started Skyping with my parents this weekend, which has made being apart a bit more tolerable. I can sit here and type for days, but there's not enough toilet paper in the house for me to keep blowing my nose. I miss and love you all more than I can ever put into words. I don't think I can wait until next year to see your smiling faces again.

Here are just some of the pictures we/our family and friends took. There are thousands that we still have to weed through, so please be patient with us.